Words of Fuck – a story about expressing desires
Oil drips warm and wet on my shoulder, raising hairs as it runs to the dip of my collar bone. I tip my head to the side, urging him to start at that point just behind my earlobe.
Yes, yes, that’s it. The trickle on my most sensitive zone has me rocking and my eyes loll behind the blindfold.
If I were a cat I’d be purring. I can feel the gurgle in my throat and that raw animal noise threatens to escape. It won’t though. I won’t let myself go.
My lover has to be expert in reading my cues. He has to know what the tilt of my jaw means. Or when I raise my eyebrow just so, he should stop what he’s doing and pounce. Take me to that place of ecstasy. If he misses it, there will be nothing. I will be cold.
I will never speak it, but I will beg with my entire being.
Lucky for us both, my lover sees. My lover sees all.
I imagine the oil glinting in the candlelight as it snakes down my body. If my hands weren’t tied I’d reach up and grab my breast and rub it into my nipples. But I wouldn’t. Not really. I’d wait for his hands to do it. And that’s what’s happening now. I’m waiting for him. I’m visualising him reaching up under my arm and grabbing at my breast, kneading and squeezing. Cupping the laden flesh in his palm while he thumbs my nipple, letting it spring back into place while I pant.
More oil drips and frustration rises. Touch me.
He moves to kneel in front of me and cool air swirls between us.
‘Yes? What is it my love, what do you want?’
‘It’s…’ I nudge my chest towards him, eyes tight shut.
He reaches for my face, pulls off the blindfold and cups my jaw.
‘Tell me, tell me what you want me to do…’
I can’t speak.
‘Open your eyes, Sadie, and tell me what you want.’
Why can’t he read my body like the other times?
‘Sadie, I’ll do it but only if you tell me.’
He releases my jaw and hovers his palm over my boob.
He pulls his hand away a little and cocks his head, bringing lightness to the moment.
‘I need you to grab my tit.’
His eyes light up.
‘I need you to grab my tit and rub my nipples until they’re raw. I need your tongue and teeth on them, biting and suckling while you plunge your fingers inside my soaking cunt – two, three, four, fuck me with your hands and shove your cock in my throat. I want to squirt over you, I want to drown you in my come while you fuck me senseless…’
The words tumble and crash out and he drags off my bindings and leaps on me.
‘At last,’ he says, ‘I’ve waited so long to hear your words of fuck.’
Hello! I wrote this for Masturbation Monday and Friday Flash – two sexy writing memes for you to enjoy. This is the first writing I’ve managed to do this year and I’m grateful for these memes to get me going – especially the discipline of Friday Flash where the word limit is 500 – I think I spent longer cutting this down than actually writing it.
I guess it’s all about our own self censorship. Sometimes we just can’t speak. I’m fascinated by it. But also frustrated. Hope you enjoyed that. The photo was my expression of this feeling too – so much to say but utterly incapable of saying it at times.
Thank you for reading!